Lately I’ve been torn between really not wanting to care what others think about me, and really wanting others to only think things about me that are true.
That is really tricky.
Social media allows us to paint a picture of ourselves that only focuses on what we want to focus on. I, personally, like to focus on all of the super fun, exciting, adventurous details of my life. Although I wish that’s what every second of every day looked like, it’s not a complete picture.
Just last week I was told by a close friend that my Facebook makes it look like I never get tired and I have an unlimited amount of energy. Ummmmm….false. I apologize for misleading all of you. In reality, I very quickly turn into a tantrum throwing two year old when I don’t get enough sleep. It’s honestly a little bit pathetic. But, I know this about myself so I make sure to get a good night sleep as often as possible! That way I can go, go, go from 5:30am – 9:30pm. After that…no promises on seeing super sparkly Kendra.
Another comment that keeps coming up is that I am “super mom.” I really, truly would love to claim this title, but it’s just not true. There are days when I pick my boys up from school and I find myself so frustrated with them before we even complete the 10 minute drive home, that when we finally get home, I kick them out of the house because I just can’t handle being around them at that moment. Ya. That happens. I don’t think “super mom” would do that! Nope. I’m just like most other moms. The effort is definitely there. I try to be the best I can be for them, but sometimes, I get tired, and I just need a break.
Then there’s the idea floating around out there that all of this running is easy for me. Unfortunately, that’s not true either. I get it though. I do tend to make it look like I’m having a blast on all of my runs.
But…sometimes I’m just faking it for a picture. (Fake it ’til you make it, right?!) Really, coming back from 3 months off with a stress fracture has been really hard. I’ve been pushing myself more and more. And it hurts. It also really hurt to find out that the Boston Marathon filled up before I got in 🙁 So…ya…this whole running thing isn’t easy for me! But I still love it.
In the end it really doesn’t matter what everyone thinks about me. I get that. And I don’t dwell on it. But, I also don’t like to “fool” anyone into thinking that this life I’ve been given is all play and no work. There are definitely bad days. I just don’t like to focus on them too much. I’d rather put my energy into all of the good stuff, because there’s so much of that!
And anyways, I could seriously never please everyone anyways! A couple of months ago I
embarrassingly put a kind of whiny post up on Facebook. The next day a friend said, “Hey! No more complaining from you! We need positive Kendra!” And that was shortly followed by, “My wife said she’s going to unfriend you on Facebook because all of your running posts make her feel bad about herself.” So….
I’m just going to keep doing what I do, and letting the good stuff shine!
Sparkle.Pounce.Then Sparkle Some More.